How "The Container Method" Changed My Life

If you regularly have to "panic clean" and shove your life into drawers and closets before guests come over, this one's for you.

Before I start, two things:

1. I’m clearly still confused about what content should live a blog and what content should be posted to Substack. Any pointers from those who are more familiar with this app? Hopefully I’ll figure all of this out at some point, ha!

2. Do not let the above photo convince you to buy out The Container Store right now!

Or Target, which, yes, counts. No purchases. Zilch!

I know. It’s counterintuitive. How can I embrace something called “The Container Method” without actual containers?

Listen. If The Container Method ends up changing your life too, and you feel that there are a few areas in your home that would function better and prevent clutter with pretty matching bins or whatever, then by all means, go for it. (I clearly decided this was the case with our game cabinet.) But not yet, because:

A CONTAINER IS NOT NECESSARILY A CONTAINER.

Kelly’s lost her mind.

Let me explain:

A couple of years ago, I read Decluttering at the Speed of Life: Winning Your Never-Ending Battle with Stuff by Dana K. White. I’d already read a lot of organizing books at that point, and basically used them as short-term motivation. As long as I had one going on, I could count on staying in *relative* control of our home. But Dana’s book is the first to have had a significant lasting effect on life for the Larkin Family.

What IS a container, then?

The general idea is that drawers, cabinets, shelves, closets, etc. are the real containers*; the containers that matter in a home. (Those pretty store-bought clear containers and other organizing tools aren’t necessary; they just go inside the real containers. They come later—much later—if at all.) Containers are where our things belong, where they live. But containers have their limits. They can only hold so much.

When our containers fill up, it’s apparently human nature to want to buy new containers, which sit out and make things more cluttered-looking. Or to simply move the spillover from place to place—making little piles like rodents do, tricking ourselves into thinking we’re tidying by shifting their locations. And then we shove them into closets to hide our packrat habits when guests come over, praying no one opens that drawer or closet door. (Chuckle. Recovering Covert Packrat right here.) Suddenly, it feels like managing all this godforsaken stuff is a full-time job. We’re drowning and overwhelmed and WE’VE HAD IT and sometimes we dream of all of it going up in flames just so we can start from scratch and then we feel guilty we’re not evolved we’re sorry we’re missing it sad, sad girl Gracie Abrams joke how great is Substack am I right?!

In all seriousness, if this sounds like you, Dana has this incredibly simple solution that doesn’t require blocking off huge chunks of our calendars. (Who has that kind of time?!) It’s called “The Container Method,” and it totally changed my life as a mom of two young children.

*Yes, a container purchased from The Container Store or wherever is obviously a container. We’re not gettin’ existential over here! But even though those pretty store-bought clear guys can be helpful tools, they tend to attract more clutter if we don’t do the dirty work first.

How to follow The Container Method

1. Discard trash: Grab a trash bag, collect all visible garbage in your home and throw it out. (Feel better already, right?!)

2. Return the *easy things* to their homes: Going room to room, pick up out-of-place items with obvious homes, and quickly bring them back to those homes. (“This clean pair of socks obviously belongs in the sock drawer.” “This stuffy belongs in the stuffy chest.” “This cardigan belongs in my closet upstairs.”) Do it. Right now. Yes, you will need to dart around the house and yes, you may get winded. Think of it as a free mini workout. Two birds, one stone!

3. Handle the visible “Duh Clutter.” This is the stuff that you own, but know deep down that you shouldn’t. Dana gives the example of the toddler-sized coat you still own, even though your youngest is now six. Don’t feel guilty that you didn’t do it three years ago; step #3 gives you permission to get rid of the toddler coat and move on, guilt-free. Don’t worry about getting all the “Duh Clutter.” You’ll likely collect some every day while on this journey. But collect some and discard it, that way you get into the practice of it.

4. Ask yourself two questions: For out-of-place items without obvious homes, ask one of yourself these questions:

   1. “Where would I think to look for this item?”

   2. “Would I even know I owned this if I needed it?”

   Then, depending on your answers, either put those things in their designated homes, assign them a home if they don’t already have one, or toss/donate them. (For example, “The crayons now live in this cabinet, forever and ever amen.” Or, “Hmmm, I actually have no idea what this obscure battery is for and it’s been hanging around for ages. Toss!” Or, “I no longer use, need or want this. Toss.”)

5. Make it fit: When you notice that a designated container is full, discard enough of its contents until everything fits, right then and there. Think the “one in, one out” rule so many of our moms taught us growing up, or in our case, “some in, some out.” Not required, but bonus points for discarding more than you need to while you’re at it, or doing a “deep container clean-out.” But only if you want to. And you have the time. And you’re not feeling overwhelmed. Because it’s not required.

What is is and what it’s not

The Container Method is not intended to be a full-on Marie Kondo-style clean-out. You don’t need to do it all at once, and you don’t need to freaking hug things and thank them for their service before tossing. (Wtf?) If there’s no room at the inn, you simply throw those f*ckers out when you see ‘em. (Can we curse on Substack? YOLO.) Of course, donate if they’re in good shape and you have the mental capacity. But not if you’re already on the verge of a breakdown and you know that adding “driving to the donation center” to your to-do list is only going to add to your overwhelmed state. Toss it. We’ve all been there. Know the worth of your sanity, and let the guilt go.

With Marie Kondo’s method, I actually created bigger messes, emptying entire closets and dressers and whatnot all at once. You know that saying, “It has to get worse before it gets better”? Well, sometimes it would just get worse for me. No better. Because I’d get so overwhelmed by the giant pile in the middle of the room that I’d give up and then shove the stuff back into those closets and dressers—in a far less orderly fashion than they were originally organized, of course.

Marie Kondo’s method worked, yes, but it was daunting to begin, stressful and emotional to actually do, exceptionally difficult to pull off with young children at home, and even more difficult to maintain. With The Container Method, though, it was so cathartic that I felt like I was cheating. I received instant gratification because things always looked better afterwards—even if I only spent five minutes tidying when my life afforded me the time. It was that dopamine hit I needed. I didn’t have to become a minimalist, live in a “sad beige home,” or go on an emotionally draining journey, either.

The Container Method is an ongoing mindset shift that makes us consider not only what we bring into our homes, but also how we want to be spending our time in life. Is it “working for” that physical stuff? Heck no, it’s not.

It might feel repetitive at first, but I swear you’ll eventually find yourself naturally and mindlessly grabbing out-of-place items, putting them back in their containers—their homes—and discarding unneeded things and duplicates as you go about your day. And eventually, your home will start to feel in order. And other things in life will feel like they’re in order, too. Like your mind. ;)

(This is another post for another time, but I try to get rid of “FIVE THINGS EVERY DAY.” It’s an easy-to-stick-to way of paring down one’s possessions. You’d be surprised how quickly you start to feel the difference!)

(Another side note: I do “cheat” during busier days. To save time, I use stair baskets to collect out-of-place items, and then grab as much as I can when I’m going up or down, and put the items in their designated homes. I make sure that the baskets are emptied at least once every day. So yeah, I’m still making those rodent piles. But at least I handle them now!)

How it’s actually changed my life

• I spend less time tidying and more time having fun. Our home is filled with fewer things—mostly stuff we actually use and love—and less stuff means less managing. We go through containers somewhat regularly, so there aren’t things like unloved stuffies, “just okay” clothing, or used-up coloring books demanding our time. And what greater gift is the gift of time?

• I buy less. I know the girls don’t need new swimsuits because their swimsuit containers are FULL. It’s just like keeping track of inventory!

• Actual cleaning is easier. I’ve learned that there’s an actual difference between tidying and cleaning. Before, I grouped it together and did it all at once, which is how I’d end up getting overwhelmed and giving up. These days, I clean—like with actual cleaning solution—specific parts of the house every couple of days. And it only takes a few minutes because put away mountains of out-of-place stuff before I start.

• I no longer have to “panic clean” before guests. A quick five- to 10-minute tidy session does the trick. On the same note, I no longer have to spend an hour picking up at the end of the day. Again, five or 10 minutes gets the job done, and then I can sit down and watch a TV show while the laundry is going or whatever. Ahhh.

• I feel inspired to do some “deep” organizing projects once in a while, sometimes even with those Container Store-style clear bins. Key word: sometimes. ;) Because the rest of the house isn’t in a constant state of chaos, I enjoy taking on small overhauls of containers that could function better for our family. Improving the functionality of our game cabinet, for example, was totally therapeutic for me. (Love that the boxes don’t fall out anymore… and no excuses for all those loose pieces!) Sometimes I’m motivated to purge more than necessary, too. That never used to happen!

• When life gets hectic and so does our home, I no longer give up. No one’s perfect! There are still lots of times when our house gets messy. But regardless of whether we’re battling the stomach flu for the third time, traveling, hosting, or just plain busy, it’s now way easier to bounce back. For instance, when I recently took Lucy to Disney World, I left the house in a “Home Alone”-style state of disarray. Womp womp. But when I returned, I was able to get everything back in its home fairly quickly and painlessly. Pre-Container Method Kelly would have thrown up her hands and accepted her new “Home Alone” lifestyle for the next week or so. Post-Container Method Kelly got it together right away and went back to a happy life!

Isn’t all of that WILD? I realize that most of you don’t know me in person. But the people who do—and truly know what a scatterbrain I am—can attest to the fact that it’s wild. ;)

Quick little anecdote here: The Container Method is so freakin’ simple that my five-year-old totally grasps and follows it no problem! Before, we were bursting at the seams with stuffed animals, and Lucy was unable to part with any of them. But she now has a container—a huge trunk—where they live, and she understands she can only own as many will fit. “And that’s that,” she says. When the lid to the trunk won’t close, she happily goes through it, keeping her faves and setting the rest aside for kids who will love them. I mean, HOLY BILLY JOELY. Didn’t see that one coming! (Note: When I used to ask her to clean out her stuffies, she would cry! I swear it’s the structure that changed this. She no longer feels blindsided; she just continuously makes sure her collection is a reasonable size.)

My few short paragraphs today don’t even come close to covering all the magic that Dana shares in her books. (I’m also sure I was off on a few of her points. It’s been a minute since I read them! Need to brush up.) How to form non-negotiable habits; how to make those tougher keep-or-toss decisions; how get partners, kids and reluctant family members on board; why doing the dishes before hitting the hay and making your bed first thing in the morning are so important; how to stay motivated longterm; and advice on how to keep up with boring-but-necessary chores are just a few helpful topics she covers. I give five stars to all three books, if that isn’t already obvious, haha. My recommendation on where to start:

Read first: Decluttering at the Speed of Life: Winning Your Never-Ending Battle with Stuff

Read second: How to Manage Your Home Without Losing Your Mind: Dealing with Your House's Dirty Little Secrets

Read third: Organizing for the Rest of Us: 100 Realistic Strategies to Keep Any House Under Control

Dana also has a podcast, which is a motivating listen while tidying. (I did a quick search for her on Substack and couldn’t find her, but if you know her handle, please let me know!)

I’ve never spoken to her before, but Dana, thank you for giving me the gift of time and helping me keep my head above water as a mom, as a woman, and as a person.

And this is why I didn’t want you guys to be tricked into buying out The Container Store today. (Been there.) Getting everything in its “home” is the first (and really the only!) priority. Buying clear bins, labeling and color-coding comes last… if at all! You don’t need to buy clear bins, label or color code anything at all in order to be successful. Do it only if it “brings joy.” ;)

PS: The game cabinet is really the only cabinet that looks like this in our home, bahaha. JUST SO YOU KNOW. You should see our coat closet.

What works for you? I’m always looking for new tips, so please share! (Especially if you’ve figured out how avoid laundry procrastination.)